Finding Myself in Solitude Part 1
BY M.A. TARPINIAN
For most of us, growing up we are surrounded by our family, whatever form that might be. Moms, Dads, Grandparents, Cousins, Step-Parents. The list has increased as our attitudes toward what exactly IS family is in constant flux. But regardless of your family makeup, the one common denominator is we were all enveloped in love. We had a group of people who just thought we were the best thing since sliced bread. We were the center of their universe. And there was nothing they would not do for us. We were never really alone.
I have learned over the years that you can be in a crowded room with people you know and love. And be alone. It kind of feels like you are looking at it all from behind a big glass window. It’s no one’s fault. It took a while to realize that as I was growing up, acquiring my own tastes, opinions, style, etc., I was becoming “Me”. And sometimes that COULD feel a bit lonely. After all, there is only one ME. And only I can decide who I will ultimately be. I imagine it is the same for everyone though we don’t recognize it while it is happening. It just does.
I learned that being ALONE was an important component in order to get to know myself. What did I REALLY like? What did I REALLY enjoy? And believe me, the list is long. From music and food to television shows and personal style. It was exhausting. And important. I found that in order to engage with others, be open to relationships ( of any kind), and be brave enough to explore the world, we need to be comfortable in our own skin.
Lesson Learned? Solitude is essential for all of us to decompress, look inward, contemplate life, and just be in the moment. Solitude is not something to be afraid of.
It offers us all a chance to look in the mirror. As many times as we need to.
And the best part is the people who love us and support us will always be there looking back at us. Smiling.
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